For women whose social lives have been kibboshed by following the outmoded precepts of "The Rules"-which admonished women to snag women by adhering to a strict regimen of deceit and chicanery-a new book offers hope. In "Get A Life, Then Get A Man," due next month from Plume Paperbacks, model turned fashion designer Jennifer Bawden sagely warns against "gold-digging," "nagging," "chronic whining," and "holding on too tight." Instead, the author advises, "Be a confident, well-rounded woman," and "Make your own damn rules!"