Pick Yourself Up, Then Scan to Find Your Man

(NU) - With Valentine's Day approaching, 33 million people around the world will turn their thoughts to romance or lack of it. Hey ladies: Instead of being intimidated and waiting for someone to approach you, why don't you grab hold of Cupid's bow and fire your own arrows this year? Thanks to author Jennifer Bawden, you can learn to take control of your own dating destiny and find the man you've always wanted. In her book "Get a Life, Then Get a Man," Bawden shows women how to enjoy being single by teaching them how to pick themselves up - build self-esteem, set and reach personal and career goals - and then enter the dating world. 

"Men run away from needy, clingy women," said Bawden. "The last thing a man wants is gum on his shoes. Men are attracted to women who have goals, dreams and accomplishments." 

The first step to a worthwhile relationship starts with yourself, she said. "Before you turn your thoughts to finding a man, focus on developing your goals and your friendships." 

Once you've done this, you are ready to start your search. It will be easy once you've learned where to go and how to scan a room to spot the types of men you'll want to avoid. 

"Don't go to a pick-up bar. Go somewhere more casual where the men congregate," Bawden said. "My girlfriend meets more guys on her lunch hour at the bookstore in the financial district than most meet in months. Men way outnumber women on the ski slopes, at sailing or golfing events, or at after-work spots on Thursdays, and Fridays." 

Once you find the best social place, it's time to become the huntress. Bawden offers these tips on how to work a room: 

For more tips, pick up "Get a Life, Then Get a Man" at JenniferBawden.com, Amazon.com or your local bookstore.